5 years

I have been a mother for 5 years. I cannot believe that it has been five years. I look at Bowden and I am in awe of what started out as just a tiny little lump not so long ago....
I remember that day as being very surreal. Almost like I was watching a movie. I was not prepared to be a mother in any way. I can say that God is shaping and molding me every minute this precious child is in my life.
Perhaps the biggest lesson I have learned is how transient EVERY stage is. With Bowden, I always felt like every hard part was going to stay that way forever. He was never going to sleep through the night. We were never going to be able to walk into Kroger without screaming about the trains. He was never going to get himself dressed. He was going to be swaddled until he went to college and then I would have to teach his roommate how to do it....

But then, one day I will look around and notice that the thing that seemed like so much drama for so long is no longer an issue.




I have learned to let loose and not be so adamant about scheduling. I am learning that I do not have to be in control all the time. I am learning about how much God loves me as I think about how much I love this little bit of sunshine.
Bowden is headstrong, heartfelt, defiant & opinionated. He is loving, afraid of spiders and talkative. He is not afraid to tell you he loves you. He is not afraid to remind you "not to say stupid".



He prays to God to help him be brave when he has to go upstairs by himself to get something and it is dark. He spent the last three years since learning to talk telling me that he does NOT want to go to heaven and then just a couple of weeks ago told me he loves God just as much as his heart will let him. He wants what he wants and he wants it now. The first real word he learned to say was patience.... He loves his sisters and shows them all the time. He is a gift from heaven and I thank God for him EVERY day!!!!